Really, haven’t we been through enough? And now this? The worst of Chicago makes its debut in the Twin Cities. The wormwood-based digestif, Malört , is rumored to ease cramps, kill intestinal parasites, and make your friends never speak to you again. Its fan-made slogans include everything from ‘Malört, tonight’s the night you fight your dad’ to ‘drink Malört , it’s easier than telling people you have nothing to live for.’ It’s something you need to taste for yourself at least once. At Palmer’s—yes, of course it’s at Palmer’s—Malört Launch Party, try it as a shot, or a Chicago milkshake (a Modist Milkshake IPA mixed with Malört). WEDS. 7-9 PM. Free.